How to Make a Two Homes Book for Your Child

A two homes book is a small picture book, made just for your child, that explains in simple, kind words that they now have two homes. It tells them that both parents love them, that the change is not their fault, what they will find at each home, and when they will be at each one. Using real photos of both homes helps a young child picture where they will be and who will be there.

Why make your own two homes book?

There are good books about divorce and separation, but none of them show your child's own two bedrooms, their toothbrush at each house, or the day they switch. A personalized book does, and that makes the new routine easier to understand.

This kind of book works best when it stays neutral. It is not the place for reasons, blame or adult details. The message is the same on every page: you have two homes, both homes love you, and this is not your fault. If both parents can contribute a page or a few photos, even better. Every family is different: if one parent isn't involved, or a home isn't safe, shape the pages around the grown-ups who are there and the home your child lives in, and lean on your child's counselor or therapist for the wording.

The book is written like a social story, in first person and present tense, describing what happens in a calm, literal way. It can support your conversations, but it is not therapy. If your child has a pediatrician, therapist or school counselor helping them through the change, follow their guidance on timing and wording.

What should a two homes book include?

Keep it simple, true and balanced between the two homes. These are the parts most families include:

• A simple explanation. One sentence, such as "Mom and Dad decided to live in two different homes."
• It is not your fault. Say it plainly, and say that nothing the child did or said caused it.
• Both parents love you. Give each parent the same kind of page and the same warmth.
• What is at each home. Their bed, toys, a toothbrush, a pet, the neighbors, the way to school.
• The schedule. A calendar page showing which days are at which home, and how the switch happens.
• Things that stay the same. School, friends, grandparents, favorite toys that travel between homes.
• Feelings are OK. They might feel sad, mad or confused, and they can talk to either parent.

A page-by-page outline you can copy

This 14-page outline uses first person. Replace the bracketed words with the names your family uses (Mom, Dad, Mama, Papa, or anything else), and give each home matching pages.

1. Cover: "[Name]'s Two Homes," with a happy photo of your child.
2. Meet me: "My name is [Name]. I am [age]. I love [drawing and soccer]."
3. My family: "My family is [Mom], [Dad] and me[, and our dog Biscuit]."
4. The change: "[Mom] and [Dad] decided to live in two homes. That is a grown-up decision."
5. Not my fault: "This is not because of anything I did or said. It is not my fault."
6. Both love me: "[Mom] loves me. [Dad] loves me. That will never change."
7. [Mom]'s home: "At [Mom]'s home I have [my bunk bed] and [my art table]." Use a photo.
8. [Dad]'s home: "At [Dad]'s home I have [my blue room] and [the garden]." Use a photo.
9. Things that come with me: "[My bear] comes with me to both homes."
10. My calendar: "On [Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday] I am at [Mom]'s home. On [Thursday to Sunday] I am at [Dad]'s home."
11. Switching homes: "On switch days, [Dad picks me up from school]."
12. Staying in touch: "When I am at one home, I can [call] my other [parent] [at bedtime]."
13. Big feelings: "Sometimes I feel sad or mad or mixed up. All feelings are OK. I can tell [Mom] or [Dad]."
14. Last page: "I have two homes, and both homes love me."

Words that help for the hardest pages

The "not my fault" and feelings pages matter most. Short, plain sentences are easier for a child to remember:

Grown-ups made this decision. Kids don't make grown-ups live apart. It is not my fault.

I can love [Mom] and love [Dad] at the same time. I don't have to choose.

Sometimes I miss [Dad] when I'm at [Mom]'s home. That's OK. I can [look at his picture] or [give him a call].

Keep both homes' pages equally warm. Your child will notice if one gets more photos or kinder words.

When and how should I read it?

Many families read it around the time the new arrangement starts, then keep it available for as long as it helps.

• Read it often at first. Repetition helps a new routine feel normal.
• Keep a copy at each home. Then the same story and calendar are always within reach.
• Let your child lead. If they want to stop on the feelings page and talk, that is the book doing its job.
• Update it. If the schedule or a home changes, edit the page and print a new copy.

How to make it on makeabook.fun

makeabook.fun is a free picture-book maker that runs in your browser on a phone, tablet or computer, with no sign-up.

1. Open a blank book. Start with "A blank book" (twelve empty pages) and add pages to fit the outline.
2. Write one idea per page, following the outline above and your family's words.
3. Add photos of both homes. Drag to reposition and zoom so each room looks its best.
4. Build the calendar page. Use the "just words" layout and a different lettering color for each home, or let your child draw it on the drawing pad.
5. Share the work if you can. Books save in the browser on one device, so the Backup file lets you move the book to the other parent's device to add their pages.
6. Flip through it in the reader, then print.

Printing copies for both homes

The free full-color print-at-home PDF makes it easy to print one copy for each home. If you want a sturdier, keepsake-quality book, the Keepsake edition ($2.99 once per book) is print-shop quality at the exact book size, with no makeabook.fun mark, a fold-and-staple booklet layout and free re-downloads after edits, handy when the schedule changes. Our guide to printing a picture book at home covers paper and binding. If the change also means moving to a new house, a book about moving can help too.